Self-knowledge and acceptance

This last chapter of the Pluriel.le.s Campaign invites us to reflect on the acceptance of ourselves, as women of course, but not only.

Through the different periods of life, within various societies, after a trauma: what path to self-acceptance?

This is the subject of this last chapter, which we hope will give you some leads on how to move towards a more peaceful relationship with yourselves.

“It took me a while to come at peace, to realize I'm not a sin”

Self-knowledge: keystone of self-acceptance.

Through these testimonies, we understand (even if we suspected it) that being born in Egypt does not imply the same thing, especially for a woman, as being born in France or the United States. Similarly, when one has suffered sexual violence, in childhood or later, the path to self-acceptance often involves working to understand our history and the events that marked it.

Remember? " Knowledge is power ", and that also applies to self-knowledge.

Understanding what has shaped, prevented or traumatized us as women is an essential step in self-knowledge, itself essential in self-acceptance.

You don't necessarily need to go through years of analysis - don't worry - to feel at peace with yourself or your sexuality , but a detour through self-knowledge can be a good way. to, over time, accept and love each other better.

To get to know your body better, several avenues are available to you, such as vulva mapping, taking a mirror to look at yourself, learning to discover yourself through masturbation to better understand your desires and desires .

Self-knowledge and the need for validation

We all need to feel loved, valued, accepted and especially as women, but through these testimonies, we can note that this need can become too invasive when we give to the other the right and ability to do so.

Without falling into the age-old “you have to love yourself to be able to be loved”, perhaps a minimum of self-knowledge can allow us to be less dependent on the Other to “validate” ourselves - to use the terms used - as a woman.

We get to know each other throughout life, our desires and our desires fluctuate, just like our body, it is everyone's business and it is normal to feel times when we are less comfortable. in our body.

“It (your body) belongs to your the man you're married”

And the body in all this?

The excerpt chosen is necessarily "extreme" compared to the situation experienced by the majority of women in France or elsewhere, but, if we were not all born in a country where the body of women belongs to their husbands, to what extent do we know our body, its anatomy, its specificities and do we feel in possession of our body?

As recalled in the article “ All about masturbation ”, a study conducted by Eve Appeal in 2016 revealed that only half of women aged 26-35 were able to correctly locate their vagina. Or the curious and benevolent exploration of our body.

“One of the secrets is to learn to really love it”

love her body

But what is loving your body? It's simply feeling good about yourself, regardless of the “diktats”. With his kilos deemed superfluous, his white hair, his (first) wrinkles, in short everything that distances us from the ideal of beauty of a given society…and that makes us unique.

To really love it, isn't it also to accept that it evolves constantly, with time, events, pregnancies, menopause?

Who hasn't grumbled at the proliferation of white hair, cellulite that is increasingly difficult not to let take root? The first wrinkles that we saw emerging and for which we can no longer lie to ourselves by telling ourselves that it's just a little dehydration?

Emma Thompson, in a recent interview on Women's Pleasure , speaks bluntly on the subject: "I think one of the great tragedies of our lives - of women's lives - is the time, the effort, the energy, the passion that we have wasted not being able to accept our own bodies”.

Why then not try to cherish it, this body: which does not imply shaping it so that it looks thin, young, but taking CARE of it: through regular physical activity, preserved sleep, the use of care products adapted to our age and our needs…

What to remember from this episode?

• Self-acceptance goes through self-knowledge: without doing 10 years of psychoanalysis, questioning our past, our beliefs, about our body, but also about the notion of femininity as it is conveyed in our society, can help us to get to know us better and to “put the church back in the middle of the village”.

• A curious and benevolent exploration of our own body can be a good way to reconnect with it, to better appropriate it. The exploration of our intimate pleasure can allow us to develop an overall well-being and a less dependence vis-à-vis our partners in terms of pleasure in particular.

• Become aware that our body is unique, just like us, that it evolves over time and that we can take care of it: which does not necessarily imply spending a fortune on well-marketed creams but rather going back to basics on our way of life, our diet, our physical activity.

The moment of philosophy: Carl Gustav Jung said that the most frightening thing was to accept oneself completely… We think that's the best thing that can happen to us!! And you ?